This is the kind of thing that happens when, in a discussion of Usenet abuse problems, somebody asks why it takes three days to get a relatively simple change made in a news server...

The Ten Commandments To Technology Drones

(or, why Dilbert's problems are all too real to some of us.)


1. Thou Shalt Not Change Anything Without Instructions From the Gods. All Configuration Issues Were Resolved By Experts Before You Got Here; Everything Is Perfect.

2. Thou Shalt Not Make Any Statement Which Might Indicate That Something Is Not Perfectly Correct And Normal; Only The Gods Are Fit To Determine If There Is A Real Problem.

3. Thou Shalt Not Question The Wisdom Of The Gods.

4. The Gods Are Very Busy; Leave Your Memo In The "In" Box, And It Will Be Dealt With In Due Course.

5. Thou Shalt Not Document In Writing Any Possible Problem Which You Might Think Exists In Our Systems Or Policies; Now, Would You Like To Re-Think That Memo?

6. There Is No Commandment Number Six.

7. Technical Support Costs Money, Marketing Makes Money, Who Do You Think That The Gods Will Believe?

8. Thou Art Not A God.

9. The Gods Will Descend Upon You In Their Great Number And With Their Inestimable Wrath If You Have Permitted A Problem To Intrude Upon Their Perfect Systems, And Since It Was Your Job To Keep The System Running Perfectly With The Good And Sufficient Tools Which The Gods Have Seen Fit To Provide For You, It Is Your Fault If There Is A Problem.

10. The Gods Know Everything, And Will Make Sure That You Understand This.

(Composed by Russ Ault, who really should have known better...)

Click one of the lines below, or click your Back button, or just sit here and raptly stare at the screen for the next few hours, or whatever...

Back to the Computer Sticker List

Back to the List of Lists

Back to the Top Page